英语短篇小说 | Memoirs of a Yellow Dog 黄狗回忆录 欧·亨利
I don't suppose it will knock any of you people off your perch to read a contribution from an animal.
英语文摘
英语幽默 | 两只鸟
Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is a sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?
老师：这儿有两只鸟，一只是燕子，另一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗？
英语幽默 | 如果我是一名经理
One day in class, the teacher assigned his students to write a composition - If I Am a Manager.
有一天在课堂上，老师要同学们以“如果我是一名经理”为题写一篇作文。
英语短篇小说 | A Lickpenny Lover 吝啬的情人 欧·亨利
There, were 3,000 girls in the Biggest Store. Masie was one of them. She was eighteen and a selleslady in the gents' gloves.
英语短篇小说 | The Lotus and the Bottle 莲与瓶 欧·亨利
Willard Greddie, consul for the United States in Coralio, was working leisurely on his yearly report.
英语幽默 | 谁的爸爸是最强壮的？
Will and Bill were quarrelling about whose father was the stronger. Will said, "Well, you know the Pacific Ocean? My father's the one who dug the hole for it."
维尔和比尔为谁的爸爸更强壮而争吵不休。维尔说：“你知道太平洋吗？那个坑是我爸爸挖的。”
英语短篇小说 | A Double-Dyed Deceiver 双料骗子 欧·亨利
The trouble began in Laredo. It was the Llano Kid's fault, for he should have confined his habit of manslaughter to Mexicans. But the Kid was past twenty; and to have only Mexicans to one's credit at twenty is to blush unseen on the Rio Grande border.
英语幽默 | 你知道我要送你一件什么生日礼物吗？
Kate: Mom, do you know what I'm going to give you for your birthday?
凯特：妈妈，你知道我要送你一件什么生日礼物吗？
英语短篇小说 | Springtime A La Carte 菜单上的春天 欧·亨利
Never, never begin a story this way when you write one. No opening could possibly be worse. It is unimaginative, flat, dry and likely to consist of mere wind. But in this instance it is allowable.
英语幽默 | 理应如此
"Thanks-it was from my boyfriend. Here, try some," she said, holding the bottle out for me.
“谢谢——是男朋友送的，来，洒些试试。”她说着把瓶子递给我。
英语短篇小说 | The Exact Science of Matrimony 精确婚姻学
"As I have told you before," said Jeff Peters, "I never had much confidence in the perfidiousness of woman. As partners or coeducators in the most innocent line of graft they are not trustworthy."
英语幽默 | 迟到的原因
Teacher: Johnny, why are you late for school every morning?
老师：约翰尼，为什么你每天早晨都迟到？
